yesterday started out completely perfectly, like so many days do! [and of course, we have plenty of the ones that don’t even start out on the right foot. but oh, i still love our mornings together so much!!] but! eventually, as the day went on all too quickly, we were each experiencing our own different little frustrations here and there and just not quite coexisting super harmoniously. no matter how many daniel tiger songs i sifted through in my mind, there seemed to be no answer but to drop everything and get out! and so, i resorted to an old standby…
one thing i love about living in our hometown is that i can go back to the same little comforts that i have always known. i remember so well being 17 and curing what ailed me with a trip to starbucks and a journey over to the park with a girlfriend!! so, on this day… that’s just what we did. 🙂
oh, these babes of mine! i’ve flat out just been so emotional over them lately. there is no end to how much i want to absorb them each, head to toe, moment to moment, just knowing how fast life goes!
i mean, i watch maddalena these days and i know it’s all sand slipping through my fingers, no matter how hard i try to hang on to it. when i cuddle her to sleep at night, i can no longer feel the infant that i nursed day and night. or the snuggly baby that refused to sleep a minute in her crib. or the two year old that i shared a “big girl bed” with for 6 months while she transitioned from our bed to hers. those days with her are gone. vanished! and now, she’s this perfect, wonderful 4 year old, still snuggly and warm as can be… still fits up next to me like a glove! but now she tells me stories and thoughts and makes me laugh with her quick wit. she’s the best. she’s my very best girl. i ask her to promise that she’ll be my girl forever and ever and she assures me that she will, she always will. 🙂
and then i look at rocco and now i know too well that he’s 1 going on 4 going on the rest of his life. he’s another perfect little snuggler, but in a whole different way than his sister… and every time he’s sleeping all sweetly on me, peace all over his angel face, i try so hard to soak in every detail! he’s perfect and delicious… squishy and round like a baby, but fun and curious like a child. it’s just the best thing on this whole planet and i just want to keep every bit of him right now forever and ever and ever. but as each day passes, we’ll go about our lives and our routine, and all that babyhood will quietly slip away before i even realize it.
i totally believe you should love and live and enjoy each moment… live in each season as it passes! [thoreau! my fav!] life is fun and i love nothing more than to just savor every step. but oh, when it hits me, it hits hard. it consumes me. and i find myself falling asleep with tears in my eyes, just thankful that i will wake up with two little snuggle bugs next to me, in no particular rush, with one more day all our own.and i’m not at all saying it’s easy… being a “stay at home” mom has been the hugest challenge of my life! it’s taught me the most about self-sacrifice and priorities. it’s quite humbling, that’s for sure! but gosh, i sure love this season. i love their laughs and cuddles and company. i love being in charge of the safety of their little hearts and minds. and even though i definitely have moments where i think i might lose my mind, they’re forever outweighed by the fact that i love my babies being babies and i don’t want it to end. the very thought alone makes me want to burn a cd full of songs like never grow up [this one, every time, omg] and the best day and you’re gonna miss this and don’t blink and just bury my head in a pillow and cry for, like, ever. so. i guess it’s a good thing they keep me too busy for those types of teenage tendencies, huh!
truthfully, i think that all the precious back to school photos on instagram lately have maaaybe turned me into a bit of a basket case! i’ve worried over schooling options for sooo long and honestly, it’s still an unanswered prayer for us. maddalena could *technically* start kindergarten as a 5 year old next year [HOW!] although, we have never planned to send her on the young side, not to mention she’s never even been to preschool! and although i have not previously felt a strong urge to necessarily homeschool [but only because i loved school as a kid solely for social purposes, haha! but really. academics were just getting in the way of my social life. ;)], i really haven’t ruled that out, either. so! i have a lot rolling through my mind about all that, and i’m just hoping that i’ll get it sorted out through prayer and wine before too long. right? right?!? don’t worry. i’ll start with coffee. 🙂
oh, my babies. they are truly my happy place. and if all else fails, at least they’ll know they’re loved, i hope! i love you, my little bunners!! you guys are fun.
Oh, their sweet curls are the best! I feel so emotional reading your post, as my sweet baby is now a 20 month old toddler, but he is thinning out and getting taller and is more little boy than anything, and I miss my sweet chubby baby, but at least he is still snuggly and wants to cuddle (when is isn't tantruming!)
i know i'm probably overly-sentimental, but it goes way too fast! i have loved every second of my babes growing… yet part of me will always miss the tiny years once they're gone!
I can't get over how insanely adorable Rocco is! And he's just getting so big! Heartbreaking through and through! I hope you find an answer regarding schooling…. I feel like once the decision is made at least there will be some peace because well, it's been made. Until the time comes for her to leave. In which case no shame in sobbing every day all day because that's pretty much my life as of late. Such wonderful little humans you have!
he is turning into such a fun little person! i can't get over this stage… i had completely forgotten how much fun it is! and oh, the school thing. hoping i have a nice long time to keep praying about it. i'm sure we will end up doing what is right for us! hope it's going well for you guys! i'm sure the adjustment isn't easy!
Your children are beautiful!! I love these pictures!
thank you soooo much!! they bring me such joy! 🙂